if you wear a smile
the world will think you’re invincible.
If they never see you cry
they will think you’re incapable.
they expect perfection
but they are all flawed people.
They hold you to unbearable standards,
and none for themselves.
You must be good,
you must be blameless,
and you must be everything THEY want.
but they never want you.
You can’t be perfect
but you can try,
but they will never
need more llamas on my dash.
Because these are the words I would never say,
I will put it in writing.
For the man who will never know
The extent of the effect he had on me:
Had you asked me,
I would have loved you without hesitation.
As terrifying as it was,
As vulnerable as I was,
I would have been willing to sacrifice my pride and risk all pain
for even a moment of your love.
And while I still hoped that maybe one day,
You would come back for me.
I know that you won’t.
Dream as I may,
As strongly as I may desire it
You found someone else.
And I realized that I must be happy for you;
For you are happy,
And I cannot be angry at you.
You didn’t lead me on.
In fact, you did the right thing
By moving on when you didn’t return my feelings.
However, to know I wasn’t worthy of your love hurts.
What I must do,
Is move on with my life.
No matter how perfect you were to me.
No matter how ideal.
Because true devotion and care demands that I leave you to your happy life.
That I place your joy above my own.
It will get easier, eventually.
While I won’t forget you,
I can only hope that one day,
I find someone better than you.